Wednesday, October 31, 2012

Trick-or-Treat whore? I think not.

That's right.  Tonight is Halloween. It's a wonderful night and I love dressing up like a crazy Bronco fan and taking the kiddos out.  However, if when my kids get bigger, if they act or dress the way some of those kids did tonight... I will kill them. No ifs, ands or butts.  I will kill them.

I'm talking about the young girls that dress up like hookers. The young boys who don't even put effort into dressing up. The kids who are old enough to drive door to door. The kids that when you open the door say, "Give me some candy!"

First of all, lets address the clothing. Today my kids dressed as astronauts.  They were so cute with their little orange jump suits.  Every house we went to, the people knew exactly what my kids were dressed as.  There was NO question.  Last year, they were dragons.  These are costumes that kids should wear on Halloween.

As we left my brothers house we saw to young girls walking down the street.  They were wearing fish net stalkings and their skirts were so high you could see their cheekers. That's right, their butt cheeks.  REALLY?!? Just because it's Halloween and you can dress up, at least wear some clothes.  Now don't get me wrong.  I own fishnet stalkings and I wear them to work.  But I wear them with skirts to my knee and boots.  Not 6 inch heels and boy shorts.  PLEASE!

My kids saw them and K said "they're not scary at all... What are they supposed to be anyway?"
I was stymied.  What do I say, hookers?  How do I explain that to a 4 year old? My husband - ever the one with quick wit - replied "college girls..."
K just said, "ah... ok..."

That's what I'm talking about.  Really? Since when does hooker clothes equal a Halloween costume? Apparently, I'm too old for this.

Second let's talk about the demand for candy.  That's right... Demand.  Since when is it your right to come to my house and have me give you candy. Isn't it something I'm choosing to do for you? Something that I'm doing for you as a kindness?

If I hear one more kid going up, ringing the bell - over and over again until someone answers, or banging on the door repeatedly then demand candy when the door opens I'm gonna pop them upside the head.  I know if some teen had come up to my door and demanded candy they would have got the... "I'm sorry you're too old to be trick-or-treating and I'm out of candy..."  Really?!?

Also just a side note, but if you can drive to the neighborhood you're going trick-or-treating in... YOU ARE TOO OLD!  Go to a party with your friends. Have friends over and play games. Go to a friends house and watch some old school horror movies.  But for the love of GOD, don't go out and ask people for candy.  Trick-or-treating is for small kids, not you. Get a job and go buy yourself some candy!

I guess its all a matter of youthful teenage stupidity.  But God help my children if I find out when they are teens that they act this stupid.  They will be one hot mess when I'm done with them.  I'm just sayin.

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Say HELLO! I'm bat shit crazy!

I started this blog a while ago.  As kind of a way to keep track of things I think that are important for my kids to know in the future.  A way for me to tell them things, just in case I'm not here to tell them later.  You never know what could happen to you tomorrow.  So I decided to reach out and say "HELLO!" to the world.

Will my blog be read? I dunno.  Will it matter to me if the only ones that ever read this are my kids? Yeah. I want this to be helpful to more then just my kids. I want this to be helpful to others as well. Will I tell my kids, family and friends I'm writing this? Not yet. I don't know how I'll do.  I'm not sure I'm going to keep this up. But then again, I just might. At that point I'll tell them.  For now, it's just me and the millions of people out there that read blogs. Or then again, back to the first question, maybe just me.

I don't get to write this blog every day.  I'm a busy mother of two toddlers and a pain in the butt dog and I have a husband I have to help along the way.  I love my family, my mother and father live near by, as do my in laws. My brother just moved home from Alaska. My whole family is here and it's incredible. I love them all. It makes my life fuller.

It seems to me, as I sit here late at night writing, that my life is pretty awesome. My kids are fantastic, even when they're driving me bat shit crazy. My husband loves me, doesn't cheat on me and provides for our family, even when he's driving me bat shit crazy. My parents and brother are alive and well... even when they too drive me bat shit crazy. It makes me wonder if there are perfect families out there.  I doubt it.  Those that think they are are full of crap!  No life is perfect. Awesome yes, but perfect no.

Are there things in life I would change? Sure, who wouldn't change things in their life for the better. But as I sit here tonight, my husband snoring peacefully on the couch beside me, I realize I love my life and I wouldn't change the choices I've made along the way for anything.  Those choices, good and bad, made me who I am. Those choices are the reason I have the husband I do and the kiddos I do.  Even though they make me bat shit crazy on a daily basis.  I just have to figure out how to clean up the guano and move to the next day... And shout "HELLO!" to the world!

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Loved ones...

I know it's been a while, I've been busy.  But recently I've discovered exactly what "Loved Ones" means.  Now I know what you're thinking. You're thinking, brother, sister, mom, dad, aunt, uncle, grandparents, etc. However, our dogs are also our Loved Ones.

My lovely dog Mulder is 11 years old. She is my first baby and my only girl.  When she dies I will be the only girl in a family full of boys.  She has some medical issues and it seems she is deteriorating fast.  She has spondilosis of the spine and degenerative nerve disorder of the spine.  She is having trouble walking. Trouble standing. Trouble being a dog.

Tonight we went and bought her a wheelchair.  We are going to put it on her tomorrow and see how she does with it.  This is going to change her life and her routines and it's going to change our lives and how we treat her.  I'm not sure yet how, but I know it.

Now we bought this wheelchair used and cheap compared to its new price. Don't get me wrong.  I would have paid twice it's value if I knew for sure it would work for her.  I just don't know yet. Only time will tell. It's like when the vet told me she could have this degenerative nerve disorder.  The only way to know for sure is by a very expensive test (thousands of dollars).  Sure I'd pay it, but would it make a difference for her? The answer was a resounding NO! If she has it (and I'm sure she does) there is nothing they could do for her knowing or not.  So why on earth would I pay that money. If I knew there was a surgery out there that would fix her and give her a longer life, I'd do it despite the cost.

That's what we do for our Loved Ones.  We love them and do anything for them. My dog, my Mulder-Roo is one of the most important people in my lives.  She's kept me sane. She's comforted me when I was sad. She's comforted my children when they were sick. I remember when we brought her home. I remember staying up worried about her because I thought she had a fever and she was just a puppy sleeping and being warm. I remember my fun loving, gregarious puppy and now I have my old and loving dog who would still do anything for me.

Now I recognize that dogs are not our kids. I know that dogs are not people and there are only certain extents we can go to for them. But I would do anything for my baby girl. Just like I would do anything for my baby boys. I just hope that I can help her feel better with this wheelchair and her meds.

Because that's what we do for Loved Ones.  Anything we can. Be it man or beast we love.